Almost locked up in Barbados Pt. 3

By Kal-F

After taking all my particulars the officer walked to the front of the car to note my license plate and then checked the little circular tab on my windshield which showed whether or not I had paid the road tax for the year.

"It looks here like your road tax has not been paid," he said with a satisfied smirk. "Man, it looks like you're in real trouble now," the smirk seemed to say.

I was sure that I had paid the annual road tax so I got out of the car to join him in investigating the anomaly on the windshield. Sure enough, the circular tab showed no record of the tax for that year.

"But I always pay my road tax in March or April. I must have forgotten to put the receipt on the windshield but I am sure that I have it in my knapsack," I said with confidence.

I went back to the car and pulled out my accordion-like case where I kept my documents. I made a search that I am sure must have had all the hallmarks of desperation. The receipt was not there and I immediately realized that just before I had left for Canada, a month earlier, I had placed it in a second case which was probably now in my filing cabinet at home in St. Lucy, twenty one miles away. It also dawned on me that I had left my driver's license and all my registration papers in the second case at home. In my desire to get to the repair shop early that morning I had forgotten to transfer the documents to the accordion case that I normally kept with me.

My head started to hurt, an initial reaction to terrror. Lord, don't let him ask to see my driver's license was my fervent prayer. The prayer seemed to work and all he said was,

"Are you sure you've paid your road tax? Because I am going to check it when I get back to the station."

"Absolutely, officer," I replied. "I pay it faithfully every March or April or whenever," I repeated with a smile meant to convince him that I was trustworthy.

He seemed to accept my word and after making a few more notes on his writing pad indicated that I was free to go.

Before I did, I asked him what would happen next.

There was a momentary pause and then giving me a long look, he said, " Oh, nothing will probably happen."

Those were heartening words to both my ears and I contritely said to him, "I am sorry, officer, I admit it was my fault. I was wrong not to stop at the light."

I was about to do a bit more grovelling which could have gone as far as getting on my knees, even though traffic was now slowing down to take a look, when he said,

"Ok, I hear you," and gestured for me to go.

Part four next week....

Obama's a hit on Leno

Sorry for the late posting, peoples, but my darn internet provider has been driving me nuts all day.

I'm sure by now most of you must have seen President Obama's appearance on Jay Leno last night. For those of you who missed it or want to view it again, you can check below.

I think he did really well, exuding his trademark mixture of warmth and authority. Do your thing then, Mr. President.

Obama makes history...again

President Obama is no stranger to making history. Tonight he will appear on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno to discuss his economic rescue plan, making him the first sitting US President to ever appear on a late night chat show.

Obama appeared on the Tonight Show during his campaign, but this time around his appearance isn't sitting well with everyone.

I may be wrong but I really don't see anything wrong with his appearance. During his administration he demonstrated that he could think outside the box and his campaign was fought on all media fronts, so why expect any different now?


Image: www.dailymail.co.uk

Home from the Cold - Almost Locked Up in Barbados Pt.2

Almost Locked Up in Barbados Pt. 2
By Kal-F

I brought the car to a stop wondering where in the world that motorcycle cop had materialized from. I had not seen him when I approached the traffic lights and my only conclusion was that he was lying in wait, hiding behind a six foot wall that extended from the nearby Texaco gas station.

My goose was cooked, I had to tell myself and quickly tried to think of what pitiful excuse I was going to give to the officer for my obvious indiscretion. In my side-view mirrror I watched him dismount his motorcycle and walk towards my car. He was young and there was a confident swagger to his gait. This was not going to be good, I thought. My goose could be overdone by the time he was finished with me.

He was by the side of the car now and his first question seemed rhetorical. "Yes, sir, do you know what a red light is for?

The pitiful excuse that came immediately to mind was, "But officer, I thought the light was amber when I turned left." I quickly realized that most likely this would have sounded as ridiculous to him as it sounded to me, so I thought the better of it and remained silent.

He must have seen the look of guilt on my face and started to lecture:

" You had all the time in the world to stop since you weren't going that fast (I was glad that he had noted that and hoped it would count for something) and there was nothing behind you to run into you if you had stopped suddenly." He looked at me as if expecting a defence.

I couldn't think of a good one. Every excuse that came to mind sounded lame:

"Officer, I just came back from Canada and am still suffering from jet lag.

"Officer, all I had to eat this morning was bread and water and wasn't thinking straight.

"Officer, I swear that red light was green when I first saw it."

A voice inside me continued to advise, "The less you say, the less stupid you will sound."

I agreed.

So dumbfounded with guilt, I listened as he ended his little lecture by stating that he was going to report me. He took out a little notebook from his back pocket and started tapping his other pockets for, I assumed, something to write with. He had a lot of pockets and it took him a few moments to find what he was looking for. I tried to ingratiate myself to him by offering the pen sitting in the key tray under the car radio but he declined. He had his own, he said. I wanted to ask him if he had gotten if from Woolworth's or Cave Shepherd but thought the better of it.


Pt. 3 tomorrow....

Canadian visitor attacked in Barbados dies

Cheese-on-Bread joins the rest of Barbados in extending condolences to the family of Terry Schwarzfeld, who died today from injuries sustained during an attack at Long Beach a few weeks ago.

You can read the story here.

This is beyond sad. The police have issued a reward for any information leading to the arrest of the perpetrator of the crime, and we can only hope that someone comes forward soon.

Image: www.ottawacitizen.com

Something new: Home from the Cold

Hey, peoples. I'm introducing a new segment today: the adventures of a family member who has returned to live in Barbados after many years in Canada.

The name of the segment is Home from the Cold, and this particular series is entitled Almost locked up in Barbados. We hope you enjoy it.

Almost locked up in Barbados Pt. 1
By Kal-F

Thurs. Jan. 29/08

The city of Bridgetown in Barbados has never been my favourite destination.

Historically, it has been the most bustling spot on the island and though pretty in some areas , it has often filled me with apprehension: the teeming crowds, traffic that always seems to have a serious mission to get somewhere else quickly, the intimidating stores that seem to say , "Stay out unless you've got money and lots of it"; all of this often tends to overwhelm me.

When I was about five or six years old my mother took me into Cave Shepherd, a large department store on Broad Street, in the heart of Bridgetown and left me standing beside a counter for a few minutes while she checked out some nail polish that once made her fingers and toes so fascinating to me that I painted mine as well and consequently got my first lesson from those around me about the how the world views the differences between genders (she was female and I was male, I was told. She could paint her fingers and toes but I shouldn't mine.)

While I stood alone at that counter, a woman with hair pulled back in a tight bun, her fingers painted red and wearing a tight fitting wrinkle- free dress looked at me and said,

" Sign, please."

As there was no other person in my immediate vicinity, I concluded that the request was directed to me, so I said, "I don't have a pencil."

Her response was gales of laughter and when a man who was also wearing wrinkle-free clothes came over carrying a pen in his hand to scribble something on a writing pad, she related to him what I had said and more gales of laughter followed. Soon other people were looking at me and laughing, making me feel I was some kind of freakish wonder. All I could think of was getting out of that store where people were stupid enough to think you could sign something without a pencil. For the rest of my life I never went into Cave Shepherd or indeed anywhere in Bridgetown unless I absolutely had to.

But on January 8, 2007, I had little choice but to go into the city. Much older now, I had recently arrived from Toronto and discovered that while I was away, my aging Hyundai Galaxy had started leaking transmission fluid. Normally when I returned to Barbados from a trip anywhere, I suffered from the effects of jet lag and would often stay in bed for at least a week living on bread and water (mostly water) until I could convince my mind to venture out to a grocery store. But on this day in history I was met with an emergency and had few other options but to take my car to a repair shop on the western outskirts of Bridgetown.

Arriving just after dawn to ensure I was the first customer at the shop (in retrospect a mistake, since the workers insisted I buy them breakfast), my car was fixed by mid-afternoon. Relieved but tired after wondering around the city all morning in a jet-lagged malaise and carefully trying to avoid Cave Shepherd while waiting for the car, I cherished the thought of getting out of the city and heading north to St. Lucy, back to my bread and water.

The effects of jet lag proved to be far more serious than I had realized, however, because five minutes later I found myself in the heart of Bridgetown wondering why the devil I had driven in the direction I was going. A corrective manoeuvre to the left soon found me driving north from Lower Broad Street past Woolworth's where my mother had bought me my first pencil following the Cave Shepherd incident, past Central police station and ever progressing northward. It was 2:45 in the afternoon and traffic was surprisingly light. The traffic lights along the way showed a welcome sheen of green and it seemed that my escape from the city would be easy.

Ten yards from the second traffic lights at the Bank Hall intersection the green suddenly changed to amber but my split second decision was to proceed since I was planning to make a left turn ( driving is on the left on this sun-kissed isle that was once optimistically called Little England) and head westward towards the coast hugging Highway One. My reaction time, however, was slower than what I had anticipated and just as I got to the intersection the light was red. There was no traffic around and I continued into my turn hoping that my accidental violation would go unnoticed.

No such luck.

A hundred yards to the west of where I had made my left turn I heard the 'woop woop' signal of a motorcycle cop beckoning me to pull over.


More tomorrow....


Image: www.starstore.com

Rihanna 'moving on'

Good sense has apparently descended on Rihanna's camp and she and the lil boy have reportedly cooled things off.

Last weekend the Bajan superstar was photographed Brown-less having a belated birthday dinner with her mentor Jay-Z, his wife Beyonce and Brandy at the Spotted Pig restaurant.





I hope this is the beginning of a real split and not another pr stunt. I guess with every sampoochie and duppy advising her to leave her abuser Rihanna has decided to take a step back. I mean, when Oprah can dedicate a whole show to domestic violence because of you, well, the least you can do is listen...

Images: www.gossipgirls.com

Al Gilkes like he ignorant

I have the utmost respect for journalist, promoter and public relations practitioner Al Gilkes, but his recent suggestion that the ruins at Farley Hill National Park be knocked down so more fete-goers can be accommodated is so ludicrous that I don't know where to begin.

Gilkes obviously had on his promoter's hat that day and was probably blinded by the dollar bills in his sights at the thought of being able to cram a few thousand more patrons into Farley Hill for some fete or other.

Look, as far as I'm concerned promoters had no right being allowed to keep fetes at Farley Hill. The park is a serene, cool haven for people to enjoy with family and friends, not for sweaty, gyrating masses of music fans to ruin with their litter and disrespect for the environment.

Sure, the ruins might be a bit unstable, but Government needs to sure up the building, not tear it down. Farley Hill would be nothing without those ruins, trust me.

Let Al Gilkes and the other money hungry promoters go hold their fetes at King George v Park or some other open ground if they're worried about something falling on them.

Image: www.barbados.gov.bb

Tribute to Jackie Opel

Sunday, March 8 marked the 39th anniversary of the death of one of the music legends of Barbados, Dalton Sinclair "Jackie Opel" Bishop.

Even though Jackie Opel died two years before I was born, I grew up listening to his music and was in awe of his stirring lyrics and powerful vocal range. Here was a man who could hold his own with any of the Motown greats, who the legendary Bob Marley credited as the source of his own interest in music, and who was backed by Bob and the Wailers and Peter Tosh on one of his tracks, Mill Man .

Cry Me A River, Eternal Love and Every Word I Say Is True are only a few of the hits that I still enjoy to this day, and it saddens me that such a gifted man is nothing more than a footnote in the history of music in Barbados.

Where is the Jackie Opel museum, the biography of his life, the full length documentary (kudos to CBC TV for their recent half hour tribute), or the movie on his life? Sure, he's credited as being the creator of spouge, but let's be real; despite the claims to the contrary, spouge is dead in Barbados. I guess what they say about a prophet in his own land is true.

Jackie Opel died tragically at the age of 32 in a car accident in Bay Street. His shocking and untimely passing deprived the world of a talent that will live on in the hearts of many, and I'm grateful that he will be forever immortalised through his music.

Obama to attend Fifth Summit of the Americas

I'm pretty excited that my favourite President and his First Lady will be in the region to the attend the Fifth Summit of the Americas in Trinidad next month. And not only is he attending, but heading a 1,000 member delegation and arriving in 25 planes. Where is Manning going to put all these people?

Even though I know that planning that event and the security surrounding President Obama would be a major headache, I'm still jealous that the summit isn't here in Bimshire instead. I can still remember working with the Clinton visit back in 1997 and to this day my colleagues and I share war stories about that visit and other visits by Heads of State.

But back to next month's summit; I can't wait to see the interaction between Obama and Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, who had no love for former US President George W. Bush. This should be an interesting one indeed....

Six reasons why Rihanna would marry Chris Brown

Something stinks to high heaven about the rumours circulating about Rihanna and that lil boy Chris Brown.

All last week the net was inundated with stories of her being back with Brown, married to Brown, pregnant for Brown, beating up Brown first and to be honest I'm over trying to figure out the truth from the lies.

I think the biggest problem with this drama is that both Rihanna and Chris Brown's publicists are spinning out of control. A lot of bs is being slung and I fear it's all for 'operation save Chris Brown's career' and not for Rihanna's benefit. As far as I'm concerned, the whole make up/marriage thing is a publicity stunt and I ain't believing a word until I hear it from Rihanna's own lips.

I mean, really, why would Rihanna commit the rest of her life to a person who assaulted and threatened to kill her? I tried to think of some reasons why:


1) She wanted to see Chris Brown in a suit. Granted, it's the most mature I've seen him look, since he often looks as though he's dressed by a group of deranged Sesame Street muppets. That suit would look real nice with a pair of handcuffs though....

2. She's really pregnant. Well, time will tell soon enough 'cause as we Bajans say, you can hide and buy land, but you can't hide and work it.

3) All her friends are doing it. Beyonce and Jay-Z got married recently, maybe Rihanna wanted to give it a try too.


4) She's passionately, blindly in love with Brown. She would have to be, to think that nothing says love like a smack in the face.

5) She's getting bad advice. Already proven.


6) She's mad as *ss. Rihanna has exhibited some questionable behaviour in the past, but unless all the good sense got knocked outa her head in her recent altercation, I would like to believe she's still sane.

But, what do I know? The chile's own father doesn't know what's going on. All I know is that if she marries or for that matter reconciles with Brown, she's going to squander a lot of goodwill being sent her way.

A question of confidence

Hey, peoples! Sorry for neglecting you the past couple of days but I was a bit under the weather and extra busy to boot.

Anyhoo, yesterday the Opposition Barbados Labour Party (BLP) brought a no confidence motion against PM David Thompson in the House of Assembly over his handling of the CLICO issue. I'm not sure if many people paid the whole matter much attention, 'cause cricket was on.

Although I recognise that she was exercising her right as Opposition Leader, I'm not sure what Mia Mottley hoped to prove. The ruling Dempocratic Labour Party (DLP) has only been in office for roughly 14 months, too early for the electorate to think about ousting them. All she did really was tee off folks who were looking forward to watching the West Indies play England, especially a friend of mine who supports the West Indies but is really watching the match to see Kevin Pietersen.

But I digress. After watching a good bit of the day's debate here are a few observations:


1) Mia Mottley must have a wardrobe full of red outfits. I know red is the BLP's colour, but I swear Mottley hasn't worn any other colour since elections in 2008. Let it go, Mia. The campaign is over.


2) Former PM Owen Arthur has aged a bit in the last year. I don't know if it was the drizzly video feed from Parliament, but I swear that Arthur looks more stressed out now that when he was Prime Minister. Makes you wonder....


3) Dr. William Duguid has really gained his voice in Opposition. The former backbencher hardly said a word when the BLP was in power, but now he never fails to be attack someone about something or other.


4) Hamilton Lashley missed his calling as a Pastor. In what was perhaps his best (and certainly most coherent) contribution in Parliament, Hammie La literally quoted scripture and verse about his treatment at the hands of the BLP. Cuhdear.



5) I don't know if I heard correctly, but former Minister of Public Works Gline Clarke said that even though he was Minister he didn't know too much about the awarding of the contract to expand the highway. Oh okay, that explains everything.


6) Poor Ronald Toppin. I swear that man has an ability to put himself in hot water like no other Parliamentarian. He was forced to back down over a statement he made about AG Freundel Stuart, but not before digging a big hole for himself. Remember, Tops, silence worked well for you in the past.

A lot of other things were said, but unlike the Ministers I don't have privilege to speak about them so I'll leave it there. All I'll add is that the debate wasn't so much about Thompson but who he keeps as friends....


Images: www.caribbeanelections.com; www.icarbarbados.org; www.votegrenada.com; www.internationalreports.com, www.nationnews.com

Damn that Tina Turner!

Singing legend Tina Turner is currently on tour after a long absence away from the spotlight, and she's giving the world a whole new idea of what 69 looks like.





Them is some genes is all I can say....


Images: theybf.com

President Obama takes in some hoops action

Even the "leader of the free world" has to relax too, and last night President Obama and his hometown friend Marty took in the Chicago Bulls vs. Washington Wizards game at the Verizon Centre.

He must have given his security detail the fits, cause the Prez sat courtside not in a protected VIP box. Here's some pics from YBF.


Ho hum. This is nothing special; I sit next to Presidents all the time.


Let's play a game of spot the security detail....


Girl, if Michelle catches you shaking that booty in the President's face....


This little one ain't shy at all.

It'll be easier to get rid of the tattoo...

Sigh.

I don't know if this is true, but if it is, I'm not surprised. When I read that Rihanna wasn't going to press charges against the lil boy, I was prepared for this.

I hope you know, girl, the world is gonna be watching you two. Prepare for every scratch, bruise, cut or welt on your skin to be scrutinised and analysed. Good luck 'cause I done.

Image: www.music.msn.com/AP

Friday Fun: Fave cancelled shows

In tv-land, it isn't always the bad shows that get cancelled; sometimes there're some pretty decent sitcoms and dramas that for one reason or other get the axe.

Here's a list of some of my fave shows that have gotten cancelled in recent years. These days I don't get to watch as much tv as I used to but when I can I like to take in Chuck (dweeby but silly fun), Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles , 24 and Ugly Betty.

I've been hearing good things about Damages, Burn Notice, Fringe and True Blood but with the little one I'll probably have to watch those on DVD sometime in future. Anyhoo, here's my Top 10:


www.impawards.com
10. Cane. It isn't every day you come across a drama in which the central cast is not only all-Hispanic, but wealthy as well. I love Jimmy Smits so I hung in there with the show, and it wasn't bad at all. Unfortunately, it got the chop last year.


www.entertainmentwallpaper.com
9. Men in Trees. Poor Anne Heche can't get a break. Just when Men in Trees seemed to be in for the long haul, it was cancelled abruptly sometime last year. Oh well, at least she got a new husband out of it....


www.televisionwithoutpity.com
8. Jericho. The premise of Jericho was that a nuclear bomb pretty much wipes out normal life in the US, except for the small town of Jerico somewhere in the midwest. I like these kinds of shows, and it had all the elements of good drama. But alas, it bit the dust despite furious protests and petitions from fans.


www.televisionwithoutpity.com
7. Everwood. Teen angst (including a boyfriend in a coma) and father-son tensions abounded in this popular drama. The snow-clad mountain scenes made me feel like taking a trip to Colorado, and I can't even stand the cold. I guess neither could the studio executives. Pity.


http://tv.popcrunch.com
6. Firefly. A show about cowboys and girls in space? Only Joss Whedon of Buffy and Angel fame could pull that off. Alas, Firefly didn't stick around as long as those shows, but at least we got a decent movie, Serenity, out of it. And I can still watch River Tam on Terminator and Jayne on Chuck. Watch the shows if you want to figure out what I mean.


www.starpulse.com
5. Moonlight. I love vampire shows, and this one was a vampire love story so I really, really liked it. And it didn't suck at all, all pun intended so I don't know why it was cancelled.


www.popsucker.net
4. Boston Legal. No more Denny Crane and Alan Shore. Boo hoo. My Monday nights will never be the same again.


www.televisionwithoutpity.com
3. Roswell. I never missed an episode of Roswell and I was surprised when the well-written show about teen aliens in the New Mexico town was axed a few years back. Since then Katherine Heigl has become a big star thanks to Grey's Anatomy and two of the other cast members are on CSI Miami.


http://blogs.pioneerlocal.com
2. Alias. I loved me some Sydney Bristow. The wigs, the fight scenes and above all, her love for Agent Michael Vaughan. However, I wasn't surprised when the show ended because the real-life relationship between Jen Garner and her co-star Michael Vartan also went kaput and that must have been awkward. Plus, that darn Rambaldi plot was too hard to follow. It was a good show for a while though, and it's missed.


http://tv.popcrunch.com
1. Prison Break. When I heard that PB was being cancelled and was in the process of wrapping up its final episodes, I had mixed feelings. As much as I love the characters, the show was never really the same since seaon one when they bust out of Fox River. I hope I see Went Miller in some more shows though - he's too pretty not to be on tv.

Send me your faves too and send me some shows which are still running but should be cancelled. Have a good weekend!

Fast and Furious crew are back

Just when we thought the streets were safe, another Fast and Furious movie is due to hit theatres in April. This time around, as the tagline goes, it's a new model with the original parts; the original cast members Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Jordana Brewster and Michelle Rodriguez are back.

I might actually watch this one, 'cause I love me some Vin Diesel. I guess they're all returning to their roots, 'cause most of them haven't done a decent movie since the first Fast and Furious....

A little more love: Guess Who

Well, there're only two more days before the month of love ends - even though we should show love every day - so I've decided to post up a very easy guess who:



Who's the engaged couple looking all lovey-dovey during a trip to Africa?

Easy, right? None other than Mr. President himself, Barack Obama and his First Lady Michelle O. They too sweet.



Incidentally, last night the Obamas held a concert in the East Room of the White House and a party to celebrate Stevie Wonder being awarded the Library of Congress Gershwin Prize for Popular Song.





I love me some Stevie Wonder. From Superstition to Ribbon in the Sky, Stevie's body of work is a monument to the man's talent. Congrats, Stevie!



Images: www.theybf.com

Obama's first address to joint session of Congress

Five weeks into his first term as President of the United States, Barack Obama gave his first address yesterday to a joint session of Congress. It was a frank speech and he didn't spare any of the sectors that could be held responsible for the current economic state of the USA. However, he did offer hope that the nation could be rebuilt.

You can read the story here and check out the video below.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Dear Rihanna....

Dear Rihanna,

Girl, I wasn't planning to blog nuh more 'bout your present 'troubles', 'cause I know that the case coming up soon and it's all up to the courts to decide on wuh really went down wid you and that lil boy.

Anyhow, that was the plan, till I butt up pun this story here. Girl, I hope you tell that fella which part he could stuff his gift!

Now, cuhdear, you mean to tell me that he haul off and smack you 'bout like he is Mike Tyson on crack, and he got the gall to think he could make it all better by sending you jewelry?! I know diamonds supposed to be a girl's best friend but he can't be for real!

I hope you ain't playing you falling for this stunt, 'cause I suspect he know he *ss is grass in court if you testify. I surprised he got any money left to be buying fancy diamonds, 'cause he like public enemy number one since his "mistake". The way things going he might not even be able to get a spot on Dancing with the Stars to stage a comeback.

Now, you never tell me wuh really happen, and some people say you start the fight. Maybe so, though I would hope that if you decide to pick a fight with a man you at least got some back up brass knuckles or something. But no matter how it start, the end result wasn't in your favour at all.

I know you love the lil idiot, but cuhdear, any man that could beat you and left you pun the side of the road ain't worth sh*te. Whitney kept going back to Bobby 'cause she did pun drugs; I don't think you have that excuse.

Take your own advice: tell him to Take a Bow, 'cause you goin' to Rehab. You don't plan on Breaking Dishes over him and as much as you hate that you love him, you might just have to stab him with your Umbrella next time.

Be strong, girl.

Love,

Bajegirl

Image: www.hometownhollywood.com